Monday, 11 December 2017
2:23 am
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Posted by: Fluteboy
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Snow joke

My partner Hannah has a bit of a love affair with snow. She does love it when "there's tinkles". I don't, because it's cold and it hinders. Nevertheless, it was her birthday yesterday, and she awoke to see her beloved tinkles falling from the sky and covering absolutely EVERYTHING! So easy to please! I just made sure the home was warm enough.

We have two cats, and for some unknown reason, they chose to stop using the litter tray and instead leave their deposits outdoors. One of them even does the unheard-of and poops in HER OWN garden. This of course gives me the task of venturing outdoors to pick up these mini-roundabouts. With the snow on the ground, I elected to pouring some cat litter into a shallow storage box, so that they could serve up their doings in the warmth of their own home. Waste of time. When I stepped out the back door to smoke, she came darting out onto the snow-covered lawn, and faithfully plonked her 1 and 2 in the snow! The other cat was sensible enough to do so indoors.

Iain Lee sadly did not win on I'm a Celebrity..., though he did come a respectable third place. Tonight we had the pleasure of watching him tasked with having to consume a pig's v@g!na - which he dutifully did! He would eventually be rewarded with Pigs In Blankets, which I can only imagine would be more flavoursome than a chunk of hairy noo-noo on a cocktail stick. If one thing has been achieved from all this, his Twitter follower count has gone from 55,000 to over 100,000!

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